Saturday, February 4, 2012

Leadership Series - Part V - Confidence or Arrogance?

I think all strong leaders have an ego.  That’s what makes them want to be leaders and that’s what makes them successful.  But it is how they display that ego that will determine how they will be remembered. The Free On-line Dictionary defines ego as an exaggerated sense of self-importance or  conceit OR an appropriate pride in oneself or self-esteem.  In other words, it is confidence or arrogance and there is a fine line between the two. 

I think you have to have confidence in yourself and to display that confidence outwardly to be an effective leader. I can recall many times when I second guessed a decision I had made but I tried to maintain the air that I had made the right decision.  We just have to ensure that the air of confidence isn't misinterpreted as arrogance. I am sure everyone can identify a politician or leader who appears to be arrogant.  If you have to describe them in few words, what would be the first to come to mind? Successful? Likable? Memorable? Someone you would want to have dinner with?  Probably none of those would be the first.  Although these people may be highly successful in their own way, probably the first word that would come to mind would be Arrogance.

I thought it might be fun to look at the differences between confidence and arrogance.  It will be easy to see which we want to be.
If you are confident, you are prepared to:

- Listen and learn;
- Share accolades;
- Admit mistakes;
- Encourage results;
- Be approachable;
- Train others to replace you;
- Reach for higher goals;
- Explain expectations clearly; and,
- Carry yourself with self assurance.

If you are arrogant, you are prepared to:

- Not bother listening;
- Take all the credit;
- Try to share the blame;
- Expect (demand) results;
- Be distant;
- Ignore training for others;
- Assume higher goals will come to you;
- Expect people to know what the expectations are; and,
- Walk around with an air of self importance.

It seems pretty clear, doesn't it? None of us would ever allow ourselves to slip into one of the traps of arrogance. Or would we?  Sometimes in the pressure of work we take shortcuts...like expecting someone to know what we want or not bothering to listen.  It may not be arrogance that is the issue. It is the perception of arrogance.   

Confidence on the other hand encourages others to have confidence in themselves and in you. Famed football coach, Vince Lombardi said, "Confidence is contagious.  So is lack of confidence." Just remember to walk that fine line between confidence and arrogance and you will be a better leader.

Next week:  The Fine Art of Wandering Around
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2 comments:

  1. I've struggled with the lack of confidence for a long time. And sometimes, I worry that during the moments I'm confident (or enthusiastic in speaking about a passion - i.e. writing & reading), I might come off as being arrogant. This is a really thin line we tread on, Barry, which is why I admire those who have a healthy self-esteem and aren't cocky at all. We don't meet many like them.

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  2. Claudine, I think that one of the most difficult things that writers and other artists have to do is bring attention to their own work. I believe that many writers are introverted. However, they are also proud of and passionate about their work because they know what has gone into it. In my opinion, that pride and passion will be apparent to people without coming across as arrogance.

    I agree it is a very thin line we are treading on but when we have created something we are proud of, I don't think it is arrogance to let the world know about it. Your readers will be happy that you shared it with them.

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